Conversations with Daniel: Paula Lent (Part 2 of 2)

This article is part of a series of interviews of members of the Ablaze community conducted by Ablaze member Dan Micinski. Today we present the second installment of Dan’s interview with Paula Lent, a local Office Coordinator who was an initial member of Ablaze Mission's former Bible Study at Little Flower parish, and subsequently participated in all the offered series, becoming a leader in many of them, an intern, Advisory Board member, and the former blog manager. This interview was conducted in June 2025. 

One of the articles I read mentioned you worked as a caregiver for the Sisters of the Holy Cross. Could you tell me about that? Any takeaways/stories?

It was a deeply beautiful experience. I loved working there, spending time with the Sisters, helping them with their tasks of daily living. The Holy Spirit so tangibly filled that space—there was a holy peace that pervaded it, and I could always hear the Lord more clearly when I was there. Most of the Sisters I served had dementia or some form of memory loss, and yet the Holy Spirit would speak directly to unspoken things in my heart through them.

For example, going into work one day, I told the Lord, “It’s going to be really difficult when a Sister dies. That’s going to be a really hard part of this job.” Then, a short while into my shift, one of the Sisters—who tended to keep to herself alone in her room—came out and started talking to me in the hallway. Completely unbidden (I hadn’t shared anything about my morning’s thoughts), she said, “It will be hard when someone dies. But you’ll know that they’re going on to someplace happier, and they’ll get to see their families again.” She then pointed to the nearby chapel and said, “So when that happens, you can go there and pray, and that will help.”

Another time, I had a very early shift and ended up waking up even earlier due to random insomnia. Losing even a little sleep tends to have an impact on my health, and I felt pretty sick and nauseous. As I was thinking about work, I thought I could probably still do everything required, but had the very momentary thought of “it would be easiest if I didn’t have to take care of Sister K,” simply because she was the least independent so it required more of me to help her, and she had a really nasty rash and I was concerned the sight of it would affect my already queasy stomach. 

I had a great day at work—very present to each person and task, and able to work through the feelings of sickness—and had completely forgotten about my concern about helping Sister K until later that afternoon. Through the Holy Spirit, the thought, “Sister K woke up singing today,” all of a sudden came to my mind, and I realized how amazingly the Lord had acted that day.

Sr. K is very nonverbal, and it could be hard to communicate with her. When I [had done my initial orientation training], I helped to shower her and was told that she couldn’t understand the need to close her eyes when you shampoo her, for example. She was also a bit of a bigger woman, and sometimes one needed to exert a lot of effort to physically help her move around or get out of bed. That early morning, I had been asked to get her up by myself and shower her. She woke up singing, and scooted to the edge of the bed right away, all on her own. We made our way to the shower room, and she kept singing and playfully moving her feet around, and working with me as she was sitting on the shower chair. It was a delightful, lighthearted, and easy time together. She was smiling away. And, her rash had miraculously cleared up! Even the nurse was surprised.

Before I took the job, I had interviewed (as a journalist) someone who served with the Red Cross at Ground Zero in the aftermath of 9/11. She led a team that visited the homes of survivors or families who had lost loved ones. She said that she taught her team to be servants (i.e. serve as Jesus served) to those who were suffering: Visiting people in their homes, she told her team, “We the team don’t stand; we sit, or we sit on the floor,” in order to show reverence for the suffering of those they were serving and clearly convey that they were there to help and not to take control. I really took that to heart, and always tried to physically lower myself as much as possible to the Sisters, so that it was clear—especially to the ones whose mental function was most impaired—that I was there to serve and accompany them, not take control. I’d often kneel/squat down to talk to someone sitting in a chair, for example.

Sr. X struggled with loneliness. She had converted to Catholicism later in life and was ostracized from her previous Christian community as a result. Then, while she was a novice, her dad died in an automobile accident, so she went back home for a while to be with her mother. When she returned to the novitiate, she was in a different novitiate class than the one she had started with and wasn’t able to fit in completely. Though she lived a beautiful life of service, including abroad, the experience of not being included, and being seen as someone apart, was a cross that she always carried and which continued to plague her in her old age. She’d tell me, “I don’t want to go to my room because I’m so very alone.” When I realized that simply verbally reassuring her, “You're not alone, everyone here loves and cares for you,” was ineffective, I became extremely intentional about trying to spend time physically close to her—sitting right next to her whenever she ate her meals, for example—and taking as much time with her as possible, to communicate by my presence that she wasn’t alone. In the evenings, as she watched the television in the common room, I would sit on the floor next to her chair so it was clear I was there to be with her, not to watch TV too. All this had a really positive impact on her; it made her much more peaceful. She loved looking down at me sitting beside her, and sharing her thoughts with me; at times, she’d reach over and take my hand and we’d sit there quietly holding hands, just being together. She then started to give me long hugs when I tucked her into bed, and once told me I felt like the granddaughter she never had (which meant a great deal to me, as I had lost my grandmother, whom I was very close to, shortly before taking the job). The other staff eventually began to offer to take care of other Sisters so I could spend more time with Sr. X—swapping me for whomever I was working with and sending me off to help her into bed, for example. 

There’s lots more I could share, but in terms of takeaways, I received two really good pieces of advice from people I reached out to when I got the job. Someone advised to always try to enter into the other person’s world: If you’re looking out a window together, don’t describe the view yourself, but ask what the other person is seeing. I asked another person for advice in particular if a Sister was scared and confused when using a piece of transfer equipment, such as an EZ lift. She said that one thing that’s really important is to never approach someone front-on, because that can seem to the person like you’re there to take away their independence and to control them. Rather, one should come from the side, shoulder to shoulder: You’re there to walk alongside them, accompanying them on their journey. I think both pieces of advice transition well to ministerial/spiritual accompaniment too.

Who have been some of the most impactful people on your faith Life (role models, spiritual directors etc)?

My friend Kathy, whom I mentioned earlier. She gave me informal spiritual direction/mentorship and was really a conduit of the Lord’s love during a time I really needed it. 

Sean (Allen) definitely has had a huge impact on my life, and I don’t think I’d be on this ministry path (I plan to apply to the M.Div program) without his influence. He also has been an incredible brother in the Lord to me, and lovingly walked with me through challenges in a way that made Christ very known to me. 

Additionally, growing up in a charismatic Christian community was hugely impactful and something I will forever be deeply grateful for. Because of that environment, which was particularly rich in the Holy Spirit in my childhood, I had a deep personal relationship with the Holy Spirit from a very young age. 

Paula (center) with the winning trivia team at an Ablaze Trivia Night

How has your relationship with God changed over the last 5 years? What’s played the biggest role in that change?

Big question! More recently, I have been growing in my relationship with God the Father—the person of the Trinity I’ve always been the least close to. And in that, I’ve been coming to understand his provision and generosity more deeply—He wants to take care of me. Circumstances and the book Abba’s Heart, have helped with this growth, which was begun on Pentecost last year when I heard the Lord clearly say "You are my daughter" and I realized I needed to explore what that meant more, discovering Who He is as a Father. 

We talked briefly about one of your articles mentioning having a chronic health condition resulting in fatigue and pain. How do you find peace in that (e.g. the desire to ask God for healing or offering up your suffering)?

Having sudden-onset (in 9th grade) health problems was hard, but initially it led me to a much closer relationship with God through my awareness of my need for his help. If you had talked to me at my high school graduation, I probably would have said I wouldn’t trade that experience because of what I gained from it spiritually. 

But dealing with health issues for so long, including times when they were more limiting, has included times of great challenge and even great discouragement, and sometimes struggles with my identity due to my limitations, feeling like I’m always operating at less than 70% yet pushing very hard to give even that much. I find peace by looking to God and focusing on Him—focusing on loving and serving (and being loved by) God in whatever my present circumstances are. Health issues aren’t an impairment to having a beautiful and full relationship with Him, or to the fullness of life He promises (John 10:10). And I'm continuing to learn how to see my limitations as gifts—blessings to lean into. That helps me to be open to what good things God wants to do through what feels hard.

I used to really believe that God would heal me, and I've received a couple of words about that (including from a dorm-mate at college in a very anointed moment), and many people have prayed many years for my healing. I honestly should probably ask God more often to heal me. But, I've generally adopted the Ignatian method of desiring the grace to not prefer health over sickness, but rather whatever is for the greater glory of God. So, with that, perhaps there's hope that God is being glorified through my suffering; and I definitely pray for that to be so. 

What have been some of the most impactful faith related books you’ve read? I specifically like apologetics, though I am open to anything.

Golly, I'm not entirely sure... and I'm not the person to ask about apologetics. But some books that I have loved or that impacted me include: 

• Witness, by Lenny DeLorenzo

• Lord, Renew Your Wonders, by Damien Stayne

• Bread & Wine: Readings for Lent and Easter, by the Plough publishing house (I love and often return to the Henry Drummond piece in this anthology.)

• Adam, God's Beloved, by Henri Nouwen

• Abba's Heart, by Neal Lozano

• The Soul of Shame, by Curt Thompson

• And There Was Light, by Jacques Lusseyran 

• What It Means to Be a Christian, by Pope Benedict XVI

• Jesus Changes Everything, by Stanley Hauerwas

The Conversations with Daniel blog post series takes its name (in fun) from an element of the Intentional Discipleship Series. If you’re a young adult looking for a faith sharing community and wanting to grow in your own ability to share about your spiritual life or the Good News, consider signing up for the Alive Series, the Intentional Discipleship Series, or joining another of our community offerings!

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Daniel (Dan) Micinski has been involved with Ablaze Mission since 2024 and has participated in the Alive Series, the Intentional Discipleship Series, and the Called & Gifted Workshop. Wanting to grow closer to God, he decided to interview people he admires spiritually to learn from their spiritual journeys. We hope these interviews from our community are a blessing to you as well, on your journey into deeper intimacy with God.